Beautiful Humanity

11/11 I am here And when I arrive I am always a little sleepy before I see them, these good good friends. I worry that I will be too exhausted to talk meaningfully, engaging in witty banter as the daylight fades. But then I arrive, and I am energized by my love for them, and…

You still feel like home to me

One night recently, a friend and I spoke of things we enjoyed about our most recent exes. I suppose I could provide a litany of things here but it was more so based on our discovery of each other’s daily habits. A tender exchange of exactitude. When I make my coffee in the morning I…

Communal living

For the past four years I have been living in an amazing house. I mean truly amazing. It has a living room with hardwood floors, a sunroom, a deck a second floor with a half bath, a dining room and an ample kitchen with white melamine counters. It is truly beautiful. I moved here to…

The letter

I will preface this by saying that a full explanation will come in a separate post that discloses everything, apologizes for nothing, and details all in a manner that only an obsessive list making tenacious Virgo could provide. -what would you say in a letter that could only be written by hand, in cursive (because…

Big tells

Around 2011 I developed a bad habit. Some might refer to it as a tell, or a seemingly innocent physiological side effect. When in the presence of a woman I was courting my ears would get bright red, for any reason, simple or nuanced. Once, it happened at a dinner I was hosting for all…

Santana

When I first met S, I was living in Las Vegas. I had been there for almost 2 years, going to school and working full time. I was married and we lived in a great house with my mother, who I had hastily extricated from an ugly divorce in Hawaii. It seemed like a good…

The first time ever I saw your face

Running in to you today was hard. Seeing you smile literally took my breath away. I had to transition into a meeting that I had to attend and I couldn’t figure out why I kept drifting off and losing focus. You still leave me breathless with your expressions and our interactions. Thank you for your…

What I’m feeling right now…with other people’s words

20 Beautifully Honest Quotes About Love

Don’t stop calling me “sir”

After years of my mother telling me to stop swinging my arms and shoulders like a boy and only a few after her death I am firmly planted in my own sense of genderblending. Today, as I was racing through the maze of IKEA to get to the desk I wanted to assemble I was…

Facial Recognition and the Pleasure of Knowing

It’s been two months since I have seen your face and two years to the day since I saw it for the first time. I still struggle to find the words to say to you about why I was both shocked and unsurprised about our break. I wish there was more to say right now,…